How To Keep A Conversation Going

So many guys IM me with the question, "How do you keep up conversation?" I get things like, "After the initial topic, it kind of just trails off from there." It's a problem that I tend to have myself from time to time. Here's the best answer.. In order for conversation to flow easily and persist, the thing that must come into play is your interest. That's obvious, but sometimes we lose interest quickly. Remember, it's not her problem, that's your problem. The trick is to know how to pick up on things she says. Look past what someone says to what they really may be saying.

"I'm bisexual."

How can you reward that? With, "That's so cool that you like girls and guys. Sweet."
But look closer, what else is this telling you? It also is saying that she is confident enough to speak openly about her sexuality. That is something that warrants my interest more than just the fact that she's into girls and guys.

Another example, this weekend I was at a Halloween frat party. Eventually, seven gorgeous girls showed up as the "7 Deadly Sins." They were all dressed incredibly slutty. Nothing really came of the interaction. I was so interested in getting in their pants, that I told them so..

HER: "So blah blah blah, what do you think?"
MBP: "Err... I honestly wasn't listening to a word you just said, I've been staring at your boobs this entire time."
HER: (A little stunned) "Well, that's why we're wearing these costumes, LOLZ!"

Yeah, pretty ballsy and cool and all that shit. But the fact is, I was too horny to actually see past the obvious and look into how I can appreciate this person. Thinking about it now, I could have easily found some real genuine interest that could have kept the conversation going all the way up until the bedroom. All of their costumes were specifically catering to each sin's characteristics. Gluttony had a necklace made of tootsie rolls and a belt made of lollipops, while Greed had fake money stuck to her and a dollar sign necklace.

But where's my interest? I don't have any yet! Those costumes could have been made by her grandparents, or they could've been bought at the costume store, or they could have been hand me downs from her older sister. I don't know. I don't want to jump to conclusions and reward her for something that isn't warrented. Let's get some info on this bitch.

We will break it down into two steps:

1. Push for a big effort so she can explain herself better. Make sure this has her speaking her emotions. (This also builds attraction towards you because only someone with high value asks so much of a person.)

"Where did the idea for your costume come from?"
"How did the 'seven deadly sins' idea come about?"
"How did it feel...?"

2. Relate to her - Instead of thinking about what to say... Just try to imagine yourself in that persons shoes while they are explaining. You will almost always automatically feel the same emotion from her and be able to relate with something. (If you didn't do the first step, this step will be much more difficult.)

HER: "Well, we all wanted to do something HUGE this year for Halloween, but we weren't sure what we should do. Then I thought since it was the seven of us, why not personify the seven deadly sins?"
MBP: (Pushing for more effort with a vacuum) "Great idea, how does it feel to be struttin' around in your own costume that you thought up by yourself?"
HER: "It feels great......*Vacuum*......A lot more rewarding than going out to buy a costume, you feel so excited showing something to someone after you put time in working on it yourself."

You see how after I pushed for a big effort, now there is much more to work with? I'm no longer thinking what to say, she did that for me, she put the emotion in my head which triggered a personal experience automatically. I now have options rather than searching for something to say: I can show genuine appreciation for how creative she is, how great the bond is between her and her friends to plan such an intricate idea and then actually go through with it, etc.

MBP: "You know what, the fact that you put this all together yourself is even sexier than the costume. I love it. And I know exactly what you mean by showing something to someone after you worked on it yourself. When I play on stage, I love the feeling of seeing people vibe to the song I wrote myself rather than just covering someone elses song."

Okay stop. I just rewarded and related. I now have real genuine interest in this girl. The interaction can go ANYWHERE I would like, because I am no longer interested in the topic, I am interested in the person. She gave me a reason to have genuine interest and continue conversation from platonic to personal. I found her view on the topic interesting, so now instead of talking about costumes, I can talk about me and her. Any proceeding question you want will work.

MBP: "I like how creative you are, what other types of cool creative stuff do you do?"

...or whatever. You have genuine interest now, you can ask ANYTHING!

How can you get good at this? Honestly, good old fashioned practice, and make sure your mind is flowing on all cylinders. Always be thinking, keep your mind sharp. Eventually you'll start seeing more things to pick up on, and you won't even have to try.

And remember, you are not qualifying girls, but rather putting them in a position to want to reveal themselves to you. Make her work for your approval. You are an alpha male.

MyBirthdayPony is the blogger behind Tips On Getting Girls and is a Charisma Arts Alumni.

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